| VAIN PERSON | One who loves the smell of his own fart |
| AMBITIOUS | Always ready for a fart |
| LAZY | Just fizzles |
| AMIABLE | Likes to smell others’ farts |
| PROUD | Thinks his farts are exceptionally pleasant |
| SHY | Blushes when he farts silently |
| CARELESS | Farts in church |
| SMART ALEC | Farts when ladies are present |
| CLEVER | Farts and coughs at the same time |
| SCIENTIFIC | Bottles his farts |
| STINGY | Belches to save his ass-hole |
| TIMID | Jumps when he farts |
| CONCEITED | Thinks he can fart the loudest |
| UNFORTUNATE | Tries to fart but shits himself |
| FOOLISH | Suppresses a fart for hours |
| BEWILDERED | Can’t tell his own fart from others |
| NERVOUS | Stops in the middle of a fart |
| MISERABLE | Can’t fart at all |
| CONFUSED | Face is so much like an ass, fart can’t tell which way to go. |
| GROUCH | Grumbles when ladies fart |
| SNEAKY | Farts and blames it on the dog |
| DISSAPOINTED | Fart doesn’t smell |
| CHILDISH | Farts and then giggles |
| FRESH GUY | Jumps in front of you and then farts |
| BIG BULLY | Farts louder than others |
| DUMB | Enjoys other farts, thinks they are his own |
| CUTE | Smells your farts and then tells you what you were eating |
| WISE GUY | Farts and asks who shit |
| DAMNED MEAN | Farts and then pulls the covers over his wife’s head |
| MUSICAL | Tenor or Base, Clear as a bell, smells like shit and sounds like hell |
| ATHLETIC | Jumps in the air, farts 3 times, and kicks his heels 3 times |
| SLOB | Farts and stains his underwear |
| IMPUDENT | Farts out aloud and then laughs |
| ENVIRONMENTALIST | Farts regularly but is concerned about the pollution |
| HONEST | Admits he farted but offers a good medical reason |
| DISHONEST | Farts and then blames the dog |
| THRIFTY | One who always has farts in reserve |
| ANTI-SOCIAL | Excuses himself and farts in private |
| STRATEGIC | Conceals his fart by loud laughter |
| INTELLECTUAL | Can determine the smell of his neighbours’ fart |
| WHIMPY | Farts at the slightest exertion |
| SADIST | Farts in bed, then fluffs the covers |
| SENSITIVE | Farts and then starts crying |
| AQUATIC | Farts in bath, then breaks bubbles with toes |
| MASOCHIST | Farts in the bath tub and tries to bite the bubbles |
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