The Theology of Toys - Humor Source

CAPITALISM: He who dies with the most toys wins.
HARI KRISHNA: He who plays with the most toys wins.
JUDAISM: He who buys toys at the lowest price wins.
CATHOLICISM: He denies himself the most toys wins.
BRANCH DAVIDIANS: He who dies with the biggest toys wins.
ANGLICAN: They were our toys first.
GREEK ORTHODOX: No, they were ours first!
ATHEISM: There is no toy maker.
POLYTHEISM: There are many toy makers.
EVOLUTIONISM: The toys made themselves.
CHURCH OF CHRIST, SCIENTIST: We are the toys.
COMMUNISM: Everybody gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.
BAHA’I: All toys are just fine with us.
AMISH: Toys with batteries are surely a sin.
TAOISM: The doll is just as important as the dumptruck.
MORMONISM: Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
VOODOO: Let me borrow that doll for a second.
HEDONISM: Hang the rule book! Let’s play!
HINDUISM: He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals loses.
SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST: He who plays with his toys on Saturday loses.
CHURCH OF CHRIST: He whose toys make music loses.
BAPTIST: Once played, always played.
JEHOVAH’S WITNESS: He who sells the most toys door to door wins.
PENTECOSTALISM: He whose toys can talk wins.
EXISTENTIALISM: Toys are a figment of your imagination.
CONFUCIANISM: Once a toy is dipped in water, it is no longer dry.
NON-DENOMINATIONAL: We don’t care where the toys came from, let’s just play with them.
AGNOSTICISM: It is not possible to know if toys make one bit of difference.
LUTHERANISM: Poor miserable sinners, unworthy to possess toys, but playing with them in all boldness.