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Letters to Welfare Departments

Categories: Bloopers / Out of Context
Added: Mon Sep 09 06:00:00 -0600 2002Views: 8,082
Rating: 3.00 (1 vote)
Letter of RecommendationLettuce and Tomato >
Submitted by humor-source
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The following are sentences taken from actual letters received by welfare departments
on applications for support:

I am forwarding my marriage
certificate and six children. I had seven but one died which was baptized
on a half sheet of paper.

I am writing the welfare department to say
my baby was born 2 years old. When do I get my money?

Mrs. Jones
had not have any clothes for a year and has been visited regularly by the clergy.

I cannot get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell me why.

I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.

is my eight child. What are you going to do about it.

find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am living with can’t eat
or drink until he knows.

I am very much annoyed to find that you have
branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married a week before
he was born.

In answer to your letter, I have birth to a boy weighing
ten pounds: I hope this is satisfactory.

I am forwarding my marriage
certificate and my three children; one of which is a mistake as you can

My husband got his project cut off two weeks ago and I haven’t
had any relief since.

Unless I get my husband’s money pretty soon,
I will be forced to lead an immortal life.

You have changed my little
boy into a girl. Will this make any difference.

I have no children
as my husband is a truck driver and works night and day.

In accordance
with your instruction, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.

I want money as quick as I can get, so I have been in bed with
doctor for two weeks and he doesn’t do me any good. If things don’t improve
I will have to send for another doctor.

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Latest Comments
Poop Head
Oct 27, 08:52
Somebody must have passed out!
Please Stop Giving Me Tickets!
Aug 30, 05:30
Yeah, I'm sure that'll change the cop's mind.
Boredom at Walmart
Jun 8, 16:48
ha ha

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