You know you’re from Wisconsin when …
- You define summer as three months of bad
sledding.
- Your definition of a small town is one that only
has one bar.
- Snow tires come standard on all your cars.
- You refer to the Packers as “we.”
- At least 50 percent of your relatives work on a
dairy farm.
- You can make sense out of the words “upnort” and
“Trivers.”
- You have gotten frostbitten and sunburned in the
same week.
- You can identify a Michigan accent.
- You know what “cow-tipping” is.
- You learned to drive a tractor before the
training wheels were off your
bike.
- “Down South” to you means Chicago.
- Traveling coast to coast means going from
Superior to Milwaukee.
- The “Big Three” means Miller, Old Milwaukee, and
PBR.
- A brat is something you eat.
- You were offended by the movie “Fargo.”
- You know that Eau Claire is not something you
eat.
- You have no problem spelling Milwaukee.
- You consider Madison “exotic.”
- You got a passport to go to Minnesota.
- Your idea of foreign culture is listening to Da
Yoopers.
- You don’t have a coughing fit from one sip of
Pabst Blue Ribbon.
- You’ve seen a hodag.
- You used to think Deer Season was included as an
official school holiday.
- You know that Gotham is a real city.
- You can actually pronounce and spell Oconomowoc.
- You know what a “bubbler” is.
- The snow on your roof in August weighs more than
you do.
- Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of
a cow next to your blue
spruce.
- You think there should be a “FIB go home” bumper
sticker on every car
north of Madison.
- Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his
new machine shed.
- A Friday night out is taking your girlfriend
shining for deer.
- You go out for fish fry on every Friday.
- You go to work in a snowsuit in the morning and
return home wearing
shorts.
- You tell someone where you are from and they
say: “I thought that was
part of Canada.”
- Bernie Brewer is your idol because he gets to
dive in a giant beer mug.
- Your idea of the seasons is winter, spring, and
the Fourth of July.
- You know how to polka.
- Your idea of diversity is having black, white,
and brown cows.
- You think Lutheran and Catholic are the major
religions.
- You drink “soda” and refer to your dad as “pop.”
- Formal wear is a flannel shirt, blue jeans, and
a baseball cap.
- You tried to tap the “World’s Largest Six Pack.”
- Your children describe their summer vacation out
of state as a “trip to
Door County.”
- You were unaware there is a legal drinking age.
- You have to go to Florida to get a tan in
August.
- You have caught a fish in Lake Michigan and it
glowed in the dark.
- You define “swimming season” as Labor Day
weekend.
- Your Fourth of July Family Picnic was moved
indoors due to frost.
- You know where the city of Waunakee is, and you
can pronounce it.
- You can visit Luxembourg, Holland, Belgium,
Denmark, and Poland all in
one afternoon.
- You have more fishing poles than teeth.
- You decided to have a picnic this summer because
it fell on a weekend.
- You have been involved in a “drive-by hay
baling.”
- You are a connoisseur of cheese curds, and find
anyone unfamiliar with
them to be frighteningly foreign.
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